The Letter
by Suicidal Fantasy
Summary: She wrote the letter, never knowing it would be mailed.
1. The Letter

_2/26/2009_

_My Love, _

_It's been a while, hasn't it? I've not been able to write lately. Things have been hectic here, but I miss you more every day. Each year that you're gone, I recall our good times, and our bad. I remember the day we met, don't you? We were young, and you stole my rainbow monkey doll and threw him in the mud. You called him cruddy, and I cried. You never did like me to cry. I cry almost every day that you're gone. I wish I could give this to you...but I know better. _

_I hope you're well. I hope you think about me, as much as I think about you. Our daughter is getting big. I named her 'Shelia'. It made me think of you. She's almost 4 now. I wish I could tell you; I kept meaning to. To tell you, but I wanted to make sure you graduated high school first. And then you joined the military. When I moved back, you were already at basic, and Sheila was 18 months old. It seems like I'm making excuses, but I don't know what else to do. You're touring in the Middle East, and you won't be out for another 3 years. If I told you, what would you do? Would you be mad...for not telling you sooner? Or would you be thankful, that I thought of your future? Would you hate me? That's why I'm not telling you now...I don't want you to hate me. I worry. I worry that you've found someone new. I worry I won't be able to ever see you again. I think I'm being selfish, by wanting you all to myself, when I've already kept our daughter all to myself. I worry what you'll think of me and if you'll hate me. _

_By the time I found out I was pregnant, my family had already moved away. My first excuse, was, I wanted to tell you in person...and as you know, that never happened. I'm sorry. Shelia knows who her daddy is...she has a picture of you on her dresser. I tell her stories about you every night..._

_I love you…so much…_

"Mommy!" Shelia yelled from upstairs. "I need a drink! Please, Mommy?"

She folded the letter and slipped it into an envelope with a name printed neatly on the front.

"I'm coming, hon." Kuki sighed and sat the envelope down and headed to the kitchen.

She didn't notice the breeze that came through the open window and blew the letter under the couch.

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For months, that letter sat under the couch, with only the dust bunnies for company. A few toys had ended up next to the letter, but were fished out almost as soon as they were pushed under.

Sheila pulled the letter out once, and thinking it was nothing important, pushed it back under. She felt the trash can was just too far.

Kuki had forgotten what happened to the letter. She didn't even think about it after that night. She always wrote letters to him, and then trashed them. She never thought that she would forget to trash such a very important letter, one that could ruin her life that she had built all on her own; one that could ruin his life, that he had built, all on his own.

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"Thanks so much for helping me move, Chad. I don't think I could have done it with you."

"You know it's no problem. Little Sheila's so sweet, how could I say no to her?"

"Yea, I knew I would get help if she asked you!"

"You know, you really should tell him."

"Shut up, Chad. This is why it never worked out between us…because you won't shut up about him."

"No, it didn't work out because you love him. Not because of me." Chad grabbed a full box off the floor and pushed his way past Kuki. "Don't blame that on me."

Kuki stood where she was and tried not to crumple to the ground. Her knees were shaking beneath her, making her fear their ability to hold her up. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes as tears leaked out the corners. Concentrating on her breathing, she worked on calming down before Chad walked back in to grab another box.

"This load is full." Chad said, as he ignored her tears, acknowledging them would just make her feel worse. "I'll come back later with a friend to get your couch and table. You can't help me with them anyways." He picked up her purse and keys off the table and walked towards her. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and pulled her towards the door. "Don't forget to lock up." He put the keys in her hand and went outside without her.

"Why do you put up with her? She played you."

"I love her. It's just how it works."

"I still can't believe your making me help you with this crap. I don't wanna move her couch. I don't even like the chick."

"Just shut up and lift."

The boys hoisted the couch up and carried it out the door, while the forgotten letter blew across the floor.

Chad walked back in and started to close the door, when he saw a piece of paper on the floor. He picked it up and read it.

"Chad, man, hurry up. I'm ready to get out of here."

"You got time to stop by the post office? I need to mail a letter."

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Sergeant Wallabee Beatles had picked up his mail at 0900 that Monday morning. By 1100 he had read his mail, and by 1200, he was stunned speechless. He dropped his mail on the floor and sat there, staring into space. A private came to check on him at 1300, because no one had seen him all day and he was not at lunch. The private received a blank stare. He noticed the mail on the ground and picked up the one opened letter. He read it and stopped for a second. He then took the letter to the Commander and requested an extended leave for his Sergeant.

Wallabee Beatles was on a plane by 1500 hours and still had not been able to complete a thought.

* * *

I know I shouldn't be doing this, but while I was waiting on my new computer to come in, I started this story. I couldn't help myself. I hope it won't be too long, and I am working on Make-over. The next chapter should be out in about a week hopefully (I do have 4 test next week and one tomorrow though! So don't hold it against me please).

This chapter feels a little rough. I hope it's not as bad as I think though! Let me know what you think!

-Shina


	2. Memories

Wallabee Beatles climbed off the plane, grateful for his subordinate who had planned this excursion for him. The letter had brought back many memories, good and bad.

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_He stood and watched her, waiting for the tears he knew would come. 'A relationship would only be a bad thing, I don't deserve her.'_

"_I ain't going out with no cruddy girl! Girl's are stupid."_

_She let out a sob and turned and ran away from him. Wally watched her go, unable to allow himself to chase after her like he wanted._

"_It's for the best."_

_-------------------------_

"_Kuki, I think we should go out."_

"_Wally, what are you talking about? I thought you didn't like me like that."_

_He took a deep breath and sighed.  
_

"_I don't want to live without you anymore."_

_--------------------------_

_They were sitting on Wally's parents couch. It was a movie date, and for once, they were left all alone. His parent's had gone out for the evening, leaving Joey with a sitter, and Wally and Kuki all alone. Wally relished the idea, and rented a romantic movie that he had heard his mom talking about, hoping for a his first kiss. He didn't realize the movie bordered on pornography and his face lit up as Kuki gasped. She looked scandalized. He quickly turned it off and apologized profusely. _

"_I swear, I didn't know! I just heard my mom talking about how good of a movie it was, and how romantic it was! I'm sorry."_

"_Calm down, Wally. It's okay." Kuki laughed and grabbed his hair. She pulled him towards her, and kissed him, hard on the lips. "I love it when you get all flustered! You're so cute!" _

_He blushed and leaned in to kiss her again._

_---------------------------_

_  
"Wally, I have to move. We're moving back to Japan for mom's job."_

"_NO! When?"_

"_Two weeks."_

"_Stay with me."_

"_I can't Wally. I have to go with them."_

"_Why do you have to go?"_

"_We're only 16…"_

"_Almost 17!"_

_She reached up and touched his cheek and traced the trails that his tears were traveling. She was crying too, she knew it. He grabbed her waist and pulled her towards him, holding her tight. He ran one hand through her hair and down her back while his other hand rested on her hip. He tilted her chin up towards his face, and leaned down and kissed her. The kisses grew more and more insistent and they ended up on his bed. He leaned her back against his pillow, and kissed her, before pulling back._

"_Stop me now, if you're going to." _

_Kuki grabbed his hair and pulled him back down to her._

"_Just kiss me."_

_--------------------------------_

"_I'll never have another."_

"_Of course you will. You don't know if you'll ever see me again."_

"_I know I'll always want to."_

_Kuki smiled and hugged Wally._

"_Write me?" She asked._

"_Every day." He promised._

_She kissed him and picked her bag to board the plane._

_----------------------------------_

"_How's Japan?"_

"_It's okay. I miss you."_

"_I miss you too."_

"_Got a new girlfriend yet?"_

"_No. Fanny keeps asking though." He laughed, and she laughed with him._

"_Maybe, you should try it."_

"_Why does it seem like you want me to?"_

"_Because, I want you to be happy."_

"_Then come home. I won't be happy without you."_

"_Wally….Um. How's school?"_

_  
Wally sighed. It seemed that Kuki always changed the subject when they talked about their relationship. It frustrated him to no end, but he didn't know how to stop her from doing it, and she wouldn't tell him why she did it. The phone calls were becoming more and more depressing for him, and were happening less and less. It seemed that she had already moved on, and didn't want to tell him. She was busy a lot, and there was a month or so where they didn't get to talk at all. She wouldn't answer or return his calls, and it drove him mad because he couldn't figure out why._

"_I graduate in 2 months."_

"_Good. I can't wait. I'm so excited for you!"_

_--------------------------------_

He had never thought he deserved her, and now he knew why: because he didn't. She didn't want to mess up his life; though it should have been his decision, he could understand why she didn't want to tell him. The long plane ride had given him time to put things into perspective and he just couldn't be mad at her. He still loved her.


	3. The Future

AN (contains spoilers of this chapter): I had some responses to this that thought Wally and Sheila's relationship moved too fast. I intended that. I wanted the reader to realize the trust that a 4 year old will put in her mother's word is infallable; and that Kuki had told lots of stories of Wally to Sheila to make her trust him implicity, even though she just met him. I may have rushed it a bit, and I might go back and fix it eventually, but not right now. If anyone has any ideas of how to push my points more, or to make it seem more realistic to the readers, let me know! Thanks for the feed back. (I did not edit the chapter, at all. I just added this note, so thanks for reading! Sorry if I dashed your hopes =/)

* * *

Chad sat on Kuki's couch, at her new apartment. Kuki was pacing the floor in front of the couch. Her face was red, and she looked like she was having trouble breathing.

"I can't believe you! How could you do that? Why? Why? Do you hate me? Do you want my life to crumble! OH MY LORD! CHAD, I…I…Oh, God. I don't want to see him again. He'll hate me!" Her yelling turned to rambling, and then to crying. "I can't see him again." She fell to her knees on the floor and curled up in fetal position, shaking and crying.

Chad got down on the floor beside her.

"I did this for you. So you could have another chance with him. So you could be happy." He lifted her up and pulled her onto his lap.

"What if he hates me?" She said in-between sobs.

"Then he's not as great as you say, and maybe, just maybe you could get over him if he wasn't on that fucking pedestal."

It was hours before Chad got up to leave, and hours after that before Kuki got off the couch that Chad laid her on to go take a shower and call Mushi to bring Sheila home.

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Wally was sitting on the doorstep of the return address of the letter he had received. It was only 3:30 in the afternoon, and no one was home. Wally thought about going to see Abby, but decided he wanted to be here when Kuki got home. His baby had waited for 4 years to see him, she didn't need to wait any longer. After an hour, he heard footsteps and laughter. The laughter sounded angelic. It belonged to a little girl, whom he supposed was his. The footsteps rounded the corner and he stood up. The little girl stopped where she was and stared, her laughter echoing down the hall, even after she stopped laughing. Her mother rounded the corner and asked what was wrong before following her daughter's gaze and freezing.

"Daddy?" Sheila asked, slowly walking towards the man she had only seen in pictures.

"Hi, Sheila." Wally bent down on one knee and held out his arms. "Can Daddy have a hug?"

Sheila began to shake her head yes, until she felt her mother's hand on her shoulder.

"Sheila, go inside and call Auntie. Tell her to come and get you please."

"But, I want to see Daddy! I never get to see Daddy."

"You'll see him later, I promise. Daddy and I need to talk for a bit."

Kuki handed Sheila the door key and turned back to Wally. Sheila walked inside, but didn't call her Auntie. She waited by the door, listening to her parents reunion.

"You shouldn't have come."

"I had to. I have a kid you didn't want to tell me about."

"I wanted to, but I couldn't"

"You could have. You knew I wouldn't be mad."

"No, I didn't. Anyways, we're doing fine. If you want to go back to your life, and act like you never received the letter, then that's fine. Just please, talk to Sheila first so she won't be upset."

"I'm not leaving. I want to see my daughter. If you don't want me to, I'll fight for her."

"Just go. Please, Wally."

"No."

"I didn't send the letter. I didn't want you to know. I wouldn't have ever mailed the letter."

"Then who did?"

"Chad."

"Who?"

"Chad, from the KND? He and I dated a while back, and he took some liberties with my things that he shouldn't have…like that letter."

"So, I should thank your boyfriend for telling me the truth when you would have kept lying to me?"

"He's not my boyfriend. He broke up with me."

"Don't change the subject. I don't want to know about your love life. I want to see my daughter. Now, do I need to go get a police escort, or will you let me see her?"

"Fine."

Kuki walked in and sat down by Sheila.

"Honey, Daddy's going to stay for a bit, I'm going to call Auntie so you and him can talk, okay?"

"YAY!" Sheila grabbed Wally by the hand and dragged him off to her bed room talking about all her dolls and how she couldn't wait to finally play with Daddy.

Kuki called Mushi and told her not to come, but Mushi had no idea what she was talking about. Kuki went to Sheila's bed room and watched them play.

After a few minutes, Wally noticed her standing in the door and invited her to join them. She smiled and shook her head as she walked in a picked up a Barbie doll.

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Wally bent down and tucked Sheila in.

"Daddy, don't leave. "

"I'll be here when you wake up, I promise, Sheila."

Sheila smiled and reached her arms up for a hug. Wally bent down and kissed her forehead while he patted her back.

"I love you, Daddy."

"I love you too, Sheila."

Kuki was standing in the door way watching her ex-lover tuck in their child. He was so gentle with Sheila, and she just adored him. A tear slipped down her cheek and she reached up to wipe it away. She took one last look at the loves of her life and turned and walked into the living room. She sat down on the couch and started crying.

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Wally had tucked Sheila in three times, and read her two stories before she was satisfied and drifted off. Wally walked down the hall searching for Kuki. He found her curled up on the couch, crying. He walked over to her, and sat beside her, pulling her into his lap. He ran his hands through her hair and rubbed her back, shushing her while she cried.

"Why? Why don't you hate me? I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry." Kuki sobbed.

"I could never hate you. I'm very mad though…but, Kooks, I love you." He lifted her face up to look at his. "I never had another, and I never will." He kissed her on the cheek.

"Kuki, can I kiss you?"

She sobbed in response, and tilted her head up, slightly pouting her lips.

That night, they sat up late, talking about what they had missed out on in each other's lives and made plans for their future.

* * *

Well, I'm done with this...for now. Eventually, I might pick it up and add to it, or make a sequal, but no time soon.

I hope you enjoyed my little break from Make-over...I'm getting back on that now. I promise!


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